Sorry folks, this is the closest we'll ever get to seeing Lauren's udders online...I tried.

Actually, the cow costume started all this nonsense when an unnamed person whom I went to high school with, was seen wearing a similar one-person getup at a halloween party. I still regret missing that event. Let this be a lesson for you youngsters: whenever you are given the option of going to a bar or a party, always pick the party first. The bar will always be there later.